36

I bet you're wondering why there isn't a lick of a train story today or why there won't be.
It's just easy if I post my last few Facebook status updates. Enjoy.

Cindy Smith
is giving 36 the finger

Cindy Smith
36. Yep.

Winnie Forsberger

Congratulations on being on the other side of 40? Enjoy your day! Spend it with (your daughter).

Cindy Smith

Coincidentally, that may be the plan as she's up with me complaining of a sore tummy. I had plans to be at the spa but my baby comes first.

Cindy Smith

Don't you sleep? Oh wait ... ... aw crap. XXX just upchucked all over the office rug.

Cindy Smith
it's hard to clean up puke when you're drunk and it's not even yours, see comments in last status update.

Cindy Smith
Would people find it odd if I drag my 5 year old with me to Shoppers Drug Mart at 2am for Ginger Ale? Oh sh*t ... wait. Okay, if I call a cab and take her with me? Does she need it? Oh lordy, please don't let her puke again! Bloody **** and his 'I'mma in a coma sleeps'!!!

Cindy Smith
All right. I'm lying down with this kid. I'm tired. Of all nights when I have a vodka bender I get this. Can I tie a feedbag to her head? Will it work? Can I make one with a tube sock?

Oh wait, you're confused. I see.

Well, I booked today off as a vacation day for my 36th birthday with plans for a spa day. I also decided a buffet of cocktails was in order after Sunday night's dinner. Then, at 11:45pm, my 5 year old wandered into the office here at home complaining of an upset tummy. So, we sat together looking at stuff on the Sesame Street website on one monitor while I farted around on Facebook on the other ... I think what happened next is self-explanatory. I also think it's pretty obvious how I'm spending my birthday.