An encore posting of a story written by Crazy Train reader Jay X (by request)
Thursday, October 28, 2010
If you push it, it *will* come
Learn from the errors of my ways
From: Jay X.
Sent: Wed 27/10/2010 10:42 PM
To: cj@thiscrazytrain.com
Hi CJ
I thought about writing a shout out, or "shout put" depending on the grammatical capabilities of the person writing at the time, but then I came across your site while looking for the website for the shout out paper and felt my story was better suited for your site - which is hilarious and informative all at the same time.
Friday night, I was on the 17:53 LSE to Whitby. Throughout the day on Friday we had been entertaining some Hong Kong clients. At the pub we took them to for lunch, I ordered a large bean and beef nacho plate thinking that the two gentlemen along with my colleague and myself would share. As it turns out, the clients were not interested and my colleague decided he didn't like the meal. Like a fool, I consumed the entire plate which was heaping with three kinds of cheeses and more beans than one man should ever consume. I went back to the office bloated and full. This was around 3pm.
I left the office at 5:30 and took the TTC to Union. Just after King station, I felt the first rumble from deep within my gut. I thought little of it until while scrambling to get on the escalator at Union, the first fart made its way into my bowels. Small beads of sweat began to form at my brow as I fought my ass to keep a lid on things. As I walked through the throng to head outdoors to Union, I couldn't keep it in any longer and trumpeted it out slowly as I walked with the crowd.
KEEP READING ...
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