It shouldn't burn my nose, right?

Picture it.

5:10pm train. It's delayed. Full platform. You head upstairs. Sit. Train fills. Woman takes last available seat beside you. People fill the aisle. There's nowhere to go. You like to sit. You're settled and then ...

You discover that the rather hot young lady now sitting next to you ate an entire bowl of boiled garlic at some point during the day. To make matters worse, she is having a quiet conversation on her cellphone so you get a double dose, the first wave that is wafting from her very skin and the second wave that is blowing out of her mouth. It's so toxic, that it's singeing your nose hairs.

You breathe into your book. You breathe into the ass of the man who is standing beside you in the aisle. You attempt to breathe into your chest. You begin to experiment with how long you can hold your breath, surprised to learn that you can make it to almost 42 seconds (damn asthma). Finally, when you can't take it any longer, you dig around in your bag knowing you just might have at least one stick of gum and almost dissolve into tears of joy when your fingers reach around the pack and you're right.

Taking a deep breath and holding it, you interrupt the woman and discreetly tell her that she may have had too much garlic for lunch as you hand over the stick of gum, willing her to keep her mouth closed. No need for thanks, just insert into your nostril and swallow.

Good girl.