How fantastic is this?!
I"m sitting next to Courtney here (she said her name several times), who is giving a blow by blow account of her first day of her new job to her BF on her celly. She's telling him all that went on at the law firm she's working for.
But wait, the job? No, that's not the exciting part!
What's, ohmigod, so super-cool, is the dress code!!!
Courtney is orgasmic over the fact she can wear shirts that show 'shoulder' at the office. And jeans! Once a week! And sandals, like, everyday! Even strappies!!!
Then, as I was wrapping a shoelace around my throat, she described in painstaking, explicit detail what she can't wear. She was really bummed that shirts with spaghetti straps were a no.
Then, like, I've learned all the names of the people she's met today. Who works for who. Who's nice, who she thinks isn't nice.
Now we're onto all the meetings she has this week... She's, like, so overwhelmed!
(Just shoot me now)
What? There's more?! Yes, she got taken out to lunch... At Ki. Please, go on ...
She didn't order any food because she was too nervous to eat... no, wait, she got a lemon wedge and a basil leaf... barely finished either.
Oh, now onto the afternoon (oh good christ).
Vacation? Sure, she gets vacation and she met with HR for 2 hours this afternoon to talk about time off, sick days and like, long weekends, and like, for real, personal days!!!
Why God? Why do you hate me so much?
Does Courtney actually plan on ***working***?
ReplyDeleteAh, another young'un entering the work force with more focus on the perks and what's in it for them. She better, like, do a good job for the company.... *eye roll*
ReplyDeleteShoot me now . . . another princess unleashed on the poor "work" force.
ReplyDeleteTwo hours to explain time off??? When I joiend my present company, it ook 2 seconds: "time off arrangaments are specifed in yoru conrtact and on page xx opf the employee handbook". Took all of three minutes to read through the relevant sections.
ReplyDeleteI may be out on a limb here, but I sense that Courtney hasn't joined the legal firm as an actual lawyer.
Sheesh, typos galore. Amazing what one non-working finger does for your typing skills.
ReplyDeleteI was not left with any impression she'd been hired to provide legal advice. However, Lord help us all if she's the lawyer of the future.
ReplyDeleteMaybe i'm not old enough or miserable enough to agree with y'all. ^ She's happy with her new job and wanted to share with someone who would pretend to care! why hate on that?
ReplyDeleteGod invented mp3 players and headphones for a reason!
Absofuckinlutely she can be happy! Just be happy at home. Away from me. Why the hell do some people subject me to their business anyway?
ReplyDelete@ Anonymous - I am old enough to be miserable though and with age comes the right to be crotchety and there are waaaaay too many young'uns coming into the work force that think they should be starting at the top with a 6-figure salary. AND they want to work as little as possible. Not all, but enough. There, I feel better.
ReplyDeleteThis calls for a "Get off my lawn".
ReplyDeleteFor sure!!!! The young people today!!!
ReplyDelete