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Thursday, November 3, 2011

News that will bring you all kinds of happy

Because I like to be the one to bring you the news last, my GO bus fans can rest easy tonight and for hundreds of nights after now that the drivers who ferry you jokers around accepted the contract offered to them.

The contract and its terms have not been made public but I sure hope at least one driver was smart enough to throw in a toilet clause, that all buses be retrofitted with bathrooms by 2012 and ones where the doors actually stay shut. I took a Greyhound to Montreal once and the whole damn ride the door to the bathroom would sway open and close, wafting us all with a fragrant septic smell. Eventually the driver lost his mind and asked if any of us on board had rope, bungee cords, string, dental floss, anything?

The scary part is there was this guy who offered up a bundle of boat rope, you know, the thick corded kind? The kind one would tie someone up with. The driver even joked with the dude asking if he had duct tape, too. No one laughed when he pulled out a roll.

8 comments:

lswgirl13 said...

Yep, that guy was definitely on his way to a kidnapping.

James said...

That guy could have been a Boy Scout. Prepared for any situation. Rope, duct tape, gloves, a mask, you know everyday stuff.

Al said...

Duct tape, tape o da gods, tape o da gods.

Anonymous said...

Texting is illegal
http://handsfreeinfo.com/ontario-distracted-driving-news

C.J. Smith said...

I turned commenting off for a reason. Yes, it's illegal. You're preaching to the choir here. As for those who see nothing wrong with it, this isn't the blog for them and they need to surf away.

Dan-1 said...

Now all he needs is a sawzall and Red Green would approve.

Peter C said...

I like that the buses don't have bathrooms in them. Having a bathroom in the bus is an opportunity for some genius to install an "air freshener" in the bus. No bathrooms! I know I'm in a minority here, but it amazes me sometimes seeing people sitting on the GO Train next to the bathroom door that is wide open.

C.J. Smith said...

Hence why I said if they ever put them in, they are equipped with doors that remain closed so as not to subject passengers with that supposed 'fresh scent' septic cleaner.
As for the train, never understood that either... How hard is it to get up and shut the damn door?