Ever wanted to pull off a shoe and beat someone with it?

I'd like to point a collective finger at all the jokers who sat with me in vicinity next to this jerk and waited 'til I said something to shut him up and did not give me a STANDING OVATION.

What jerk you ask?

For 45 minutes, several of us on a morning express LSE train were all subjected to this man on his cellphone who said nothing but "Ah-huh" the entire time. It wasn't so much the "ah-huh", but how he was saying it that was hella annoying. I had to squelch all desire of beating him with my shoe.

Sure, there was plenty of eye-rolling, sighing, throat clearing and posturing from those who sat near him but only I had the balls to finally say something.

Of course, the jerk wasn't happy about me telling him how annoying he was and told me I was rude as he stalked off the train. I called after him to go hug a puppy until he felt better but I don't think he heard me.

I didn't think to record what was the most nerve-grating, one-sided, cellphone conversation in history, but here's a re-enactment by yours truly. Pretend you're riding on top of the train as you watch my crappy video.

Loop it for the full effect.