So I have to be a pirate for the next couple of weeks

Today I was diagnosed with, wait for it, central serous retinopathy.

My eye doctor, who is most awesome, said I could quote Wikipedia for the description, after he read it to give it a seal of approval for publication to the masses on my website.

Central serous retinopathy (CSR), also known as central serous chorioretinopathy (CSC), is an eye disease which causes visual impairment, often temporary, usually in one eye, mostly affecting males in the age group 20 to 50 but which may also affect women.[1][2] When the disorder is active it is characterized by leakage of fluid under the retina that has a propensity to accumulate under the central macula. This results in blurred or distorted vision (metamorphopsia). A blurred or gray spot in the central visual field is common when the retina is detached.

The good news is I'm not blind, will never be blind but it's awful to be dealing with this when my job is 100% reliant on working with a computer, graphics, text and colour. It's been sucky.

The condition will go away on its own but the doc can't tell me how long. The good thing is it was caught early and can be treated early to avoid the condition from worsening.

I have to wear an eye patch and sunglasses as much as possible. This is to reduce stress on the eye.

I plan on wearing the eye patch at work, and forcing all my co-workers to speak pirate.

Most likely, I developed this due to the intense round of asthma puffers (3 of them) I had been on for the past 12 weeks.

Just another joy of being an asthmatic.

Now someone buy me a parrot.