Every coach on every GO train has a washroom.
Be grateful for that.
Sure, it's gotta be downright disgusting and gross to use these airline-approved toilets where the cool, blue and fragrant water refreshes your butt with every jolt and bump, but at the very least, locking yourself in one guarantees you some privacy.
Here's what you can use a GO train washroom for (in no particular order):
Taking your shoes off and airing out your toe fungi
Plucking hairs from your chin
Plucking your eye brows
Curling your lashes
Filing your nails
Clipping your nails
Painting your nails
Flossing your teeth
Brushing your teeth
Putting on make-up
Wiping the sweat from underneath your breasts
Freshening up your "pit" stick (aka applying deodorant)
Shaving your face
Using your nose trimmer
Applying perfume
Applying hair spray
Moisturizing your legs
Dry-shaving your legs
Pulling off your pantyhose
Wiping your feet with baby wipes
Changing your socks
Face-timing your significant other
Screaming at your mother in law through the phone
Cleaning out your toes
Cleaning and flicking the junk from your toe nails/finger nails
Scooping out the dry ear wax from your ears
Airing out your cooter
A woman said this last week on the train. I shit you not. She sat down one quad over from me on the 4:53 pm LSE train to Oshawa, hiked up her skirt, opened her legs and told her friend across from her, "I've gotta air out the cooter."
Needless to say, I got up and moved to another coach.
I told you. People are gross. Shared space is not "my space".
Save it for the car or shove yourself in a washroom and go to town. You have my blessing.
Oh. My. God. That is so disgusting.
ReplyDeleteKlassy
ReplyDeleteI know it takes all kinds of people to make the world go round, but can we push some of these clods off the edge? Add some chlorine to the gene pool? Hope the Darwin Awards take them away? Anything?
ReplyDeleteI'm having a pretty busy day, but keep coming back to read "Airing out your cooter" because it makes me giggle and alleviates some of the stress of the day. Lol.
ReplyDeletewow you have certainly seen it all! That 'cooter' one is like one in a million. More-so for that lady to announce it as such!
ReplyDeleteI would have said KLASSY but someone already beat me to it!
There were only five of us on the coach when she made her announcement. She struck me as one of those people who think she's funny because she's being crude. It was just gross. There's a time and place and well, that just wasn't either. I made sure to throw her some shade when I got up and left.
ReplyDeleteTruly shameless in every sense of the word - just when I thought I had heard it all!
ReplyDeleteYou were being too kind. I would have crop dusted her.
ReplyDeleteNothing wrong with airing out your cooter. That's the way God intended it when He designed it, for lots of air to flow around it. Nobody likes a stinky cooter that has been bound up in artificial fabrics all day.
ReplyDeleteThen go to the washroom and air it out.
ReplyDeleteAnon at 1:44pm Actually the bible says "And on the 12th day God said air thy cooter out at home"
ReplyDeleteThis is why we can't have nice things (on the GO train).
ReplyDeleteThere's always someone that goes and airs out their cooter and ruins it for the rest of us.
Are we going to need a "cooter-airing" car now too? Maybe with windows that open?
ReplyDeleteAnd what had she been doing prior so that her cooter needed airing so urgently?
Inquiring minds want to know!
This story sounds (and smells) a bit fishy to me.
ReplyDeleteJesus H. Christ. I hope she was wearing gitch.
ReplyDelete