Googling myself and this blog

It's not something I usually do, take a trip on Google to read what others have to say about me or this website. Considering all the threats I get from people who swear on a pile of newborn babies that they will "destroy me on the Internet", the reviews are quite positive, such as this one, where I am described as "wowzer balls".

Then there are references to me and the site on a few train/rail enthusiast discussion boards about my views or specific stories, and even cyclists/ebike/moped folks discuss me.

Back in the summer, I was email-bombed by two people who threatened to create an anti Crazy Train blog where they said they would "trash me" and "Photoshop me into pictures doing bad things". I waited for the hammer to fall, but it never did. In fact, I was more than ready for the attack because I know my rights and we have laws to protect us from that kind of abuse online. Maybe it was the strongly worded letter from George. E. Greyskull, cattorney at law, that snuffed out the fire, but if there's a hate site out there, I haven't found it.

But what I really am bracing myself for is what may come in the next few weeks. I've done interviews for both radio and print about the site from Vancouver to Montreal, and locally in the papers, as well as a for a few Toronto-based blogs, but recently, I sat down to to give a candid interview about what motivated me to ditch my car and blog about commuting on public transit. At times I got personal and I realize I have gotten more personal in my posts on here. As you get to know your audience, you can't help but want to be somewhat intimate with people who seem to really care about you, about what you think and who find they can relate to you. I see it more in the comments and in email. Some of you have even made it into my Facebook circle of friends, and some of you have become personal friends as well. It's amazing how we can use blogging and social media to connect with others.

Where it really turned for me was when Howie died. Many of you remember Howard Bigfird. Losing a family pet is a very isolated grief. Those who don't own pets don't understand why you're hurting so much, those who do are afraid to tell you they know how much you hurt because it stirs up past pain for them and others just think it's ridiculous to cry over an animal who can be replaced. The emails I received and the words that were woven into those emails and tweets were incredibly supportive and appreciated. That's when I realized what a wonderful group of folks many of you are and it made me realize that I shouldn't fear the haters. What I needed to do was embrace the supporters. So I took it one step further and blogged about my struggles with losing weight. Again, you guys were amazing! Sure, there were the odd few douchepicks who, having not quite left high school behind, wrote purposely mean comments that never made it past the approve button. I'm not saying it didn't hurt but it's all part of the game of online life and at least I can manage it with the tools online blogging provides.

I don't want to jinx the story or give anymore details in case it winds up on the proverbial editorial cutting room floor but I hope the feedback is positive when the story is published. I'll admit, inside I'm cringing a little because the forum of public opinion is a cruel one. I don't know if my skin is thick enough.