This morning I had to travel up to Bay and Elm for an appointment which put me on the subway. All was uneventful until I was coming back. I picked up something to eat from Tim Hortons and was holding the bagel in my hand, still wrapped, when I boarded the subway southbound at Dundas.
At Queen, this man got on and sat across from me. He started to stare at me rather intently. He was well dressed. We both exited at Union and as I rode the escalator, he stepped on behind me and poked my shoulder. I turned and he said, "People like you are the reason why healthcare in this country is costing billions of dollars."
"Pardon?" I asked.
He looked at my hand. "Filling up on junk, are we? People like you disgust me. With your TV shows ... 600 pound life, and all this fat acceptance. You're killing yourself. Mark my words."
I looked at my whole grain bagel with peanut butter and on impulse, as he walked in front of me to head towards the doors to the Royal Bank Centre, I whipped my bagel at the back of him and managed to strike him with it. He turned and called out, "That's probably the most exercise you'll get all day. Enjoy your diabetes!"
And then he was gone.
I had a boss once, while I was pregnant and dealing with gestational diabetes and morning sickness, call me out during a meeting where I was putting crackers into my mouth because I *had* to eat something. In front of 17 executives, he asked, "Did you not have breakfast this morning, Sarah? Would you like to share with the rest of us. Can I get you a coffee?"
ReplyDeleteI was mortified. Needless to say, I no longer work for said boss.
Had a lady ask me once on the GO train after we randomly chatted about a delay if my mom or dad was black. Both of my parents are white. When I said this, she was like, Oh, it's just that you have black people hair.
ReplyDelete^^ I can't ...
ReplyDeleteWhat the hell is "black people hair"?
ReplyDeleteJust recently while on the Finch bus, my wife who always wears a scarf around her hea, was told to go back to Syria. She's London ON born and raised. Baptized. Holy Communion.
ReplyDeletePeople are disgustingly ignorant.
I can't compete. Other than general ignorance, insanity and a lack of manners, I think I get where this came from.
ReplyDeleteThe media has been running a host of stories about how a small percentage of people use up most of the healthcare dollars. People who are really sick, and yeah some are overweight.
But for this guy to randomly lash out at someone, it's ridiculous. Does he do the same thing to smokers, who also use up a lot of healthcare dollars toward the end of their life? Does he take it out on the person with cancer?
The media always sees itself as being benign in its reporting. It states the facts, but telling half a story to bunch of people who don't know all the details, there's going to be some misunderstandings.
Because there's a small number of people using up the healthcare dollars doesn't imply that there's abuse or that the person who's smoking or overweight or riddled with cancer is at fault. It's that the system isn't designed to efficiently meet the needs of people who need the system.
The media spends months and months striking fear into our hearts about Islamic terrorists half a world away and ignorant people burn down a mosque in Ontario as a result.
Ignorant and insane people are everywhere. You shouldn't have wasted your bagel on him.
I'm asian adopted to white Canadian parents. when I was 8 or so... we're on the subway heading to see a Disney on ice thing... when this man asked my mom if it bothered her that I was born with down syndrome
ReplyDeleteWhen I lived in the UK I was walking somewhere to meet a friend. I was wearing a skirt and top, and a man walked past me and said "nice legs, shame about the face."
ReplyDelete^That's just horrible.
ReplyDeleteWHY ARE PEOPLE SO IGNORANT?!
ReplyDeleteCJ needs to pop all the popcorn for this post.
ReplyDelete*** her head
ReplyDeleteI was born in Jamaica but came here when I was baby.
ReplyDeleteI've encountered some racism but one incident stands out from when I used to commute to U of T.
It was late at night and I was standing on the subway platform when this woman showed up.
Waiting for a train was taking forever and I was tired so I was pacing a bit to keep myself awake.
Next thing I know there's this transit officer asking me where I'm going.
Turns out the lady went upstairs to the collector and told him I was making her uncomfortable and she suspected I was on something because I wouldn't look at her.
I wish I was lying.
Too bad that bagel wasn't a brick.
ReplyDeletePeople are just officious.
ReplyDeleteThey need to learn to simply mind their own business and just take care of their own lives.
these stories make me sad
ReplyDeletewhy can't we just be kind to one another
and keep our mouths shut
If that was me, and you hit me, with your bagel??? I would have so called the cops. Ya, he was a jerk. But you assaulted him which makes you even worse than him. At least he didn't take a swing at you... wrong. You were in the wrong. Learn to not give a shit. You'll enjoy life way better. Trust me girl. And avoid an assault charge. Or worse. Someone hitting you back.
ReplyDelete^ Noted.
ReplyDeleteI would hope that a cop would laugh his ass of right in his face when he tried to get her arrested for throwing a bagel. Assault. Give me a break, bagels never hurt nobody.
ReplyDeleteYa? tell that to the girl who got charged for throwing her drink at Rob Ford
ReplyDeletehttp://news.nationalpost.com/news/toronto-woman-charged-for-throwing-drink-at-mayor-rob-ford
^^ Wasn't it proven that Ford couldn't back that up?
ReplyDeleteI wish I could do a poll. Polls are fun.
ReplyDeleteWhat's more pathetic?
a) girl throwing bagel at creep
b) creep calling cops because he had bagel thrown at him
B is more pathetic, although by the letter of the law, not insupportable.
DeleteIf someone doesn't have enough of a filter to keep his opinions to himself, he deserves to be hit with a bagel. And if said idiot called the cops? Yeah, the cops would be laughing their asses off.
ReplyDeleteBut I do agree with yin, try to let things slide. I pretty much have a permanent dent in my tongue from biting it. It gets really bad with the commuter rage and dealing with all the people trying to get through Union. But it is better than wasting good food on a moron.
After our second was born I started a new job (the same I have now) and we moved from North York to a cruddy apartment in Mississauga.
ReplyDeleteMy wife got on the elevator one day with both girls.
A woman got on and struck up a conversation.
"You babysitting?"
"No, these are my children." (My wife was a recent arrival in Canada and had not yet learned to spot arseholes....)
The lady leaned over the kids.
"Funny, they don't LOOK Chinese."
"I'm not Chinese..."
Lady wasn't paying attention.
"Father must be one of them light-skinned Chinese fellas then..."
For a while I was known as " That light skinned Chinese fella"
too bad this guy failed to learn "never judge a book by its cover" or "mind your own business" if this guy was high and mighty he really should go scold the entitled smokers featured on this blog..... thats the real health care drain.....
ReplyDeleteI'm surprised that guy could breathe with the air so thin, up there on his high and mighty horse. What a prick.
ReplyDeleteThis story made me laugh so hard. I could so see you throwing the bagel.
ReplyDeleteMy mom used a mobility scooter. She was kicked off a subway train by a group of passengers who told her to stay home if she couldn't stand like the rest of us.
ReplyDeleteI could literally make a million dollars if I got $.05 for every time some idiot has said nasty crap to me on transit.
DeleteI'm in a power wheelchair & legally blind.
I have been punched, hit, kicked.
I have had asshats rub their genital areas on my arm, on busy buses on ttc.
I have had stuff thrown at me, coffee, pennies, spat on countless times, my former service dog kicked, hit, sprayed with pepper spray.
Cops do nothing, ttc does nothing.
I hate living in this area of scarborough, none of the service agencies for refugee's or immigrants, seem to teach ppl that people who are disabled, especially woman, are HUMAN BEING, are equal & should be treated as such.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
DeleteWhen my kids were small I was walking in the Eaton center with them. I had dark brown hair and their mother has sandy blonde hair but both of them have red hair in different shade.
ReplyDeleteThis arsehole walked up and rode the escalator behind us and both kids were holding my hands on the way up. He looked at us and said "Must have been a n****r in the woodpile to get that hair colour".
Needles to say, I lit into him and he threatened my and got taken away by security. For the record, the combined families are of Norse and Irish. Red hair is common in my family.
Even earlier, their mother was nursing one of them on the GO train once on the way to Sick Kids. She was using a nursing sling where the child is all but invisible to others. A bitchy old lady got up and actually moved the flap aside to see whats going on and then called her an exhibitionist savage for not bottle feeding. She also got told very strongly to mind her own business. She didn't let it go from Clarkson to Union. Pathetic and stupid all in one package.
And people wonder why I want to punch some people.
ReplyDeleteI'm native and I'm a teacher. I take the GO train to work every day and teach at a high school in the downtown core. Last year as part of a history lesson I decided to dress in traditional dress. As I lined up to exit the train this woman asked me what reservation I was from and if I rode the train for free.
ReplyDelete@Teresa
ReplyDeleteI hope you gave that person a lesson right then and there.
So many ignorant people out there!
I don't agree with the whole fat shaming . Nor do i agree with throwing a bagel at someones head . CJ you are lucky you weren't charged. Two wrongs do not make a right.
ReplyDeleteI do not know if you have children however , this is not the example a grown woman should be setting. A Grown woman would have told the man he was rude and his comments are not needed and to please get on with his business or the police would be called for harassment.
@moi
ReplyDeleteI breastfeed my baby at Burlington GO Station one afternoon. About 1998 or so. One of the station attendants ask I go to the washroom and do it. I had a cover up pn and he said that wasn't the issue. It was the fact he knew what was happening and it made him uncomfortable and to that I suggested he should quit life. I refused and he threatened to call transit security. It got heated and I wound up leaving and a crying mess. When I complained to GO Transit, I got the typical We're sorry this happened to you but no reassurance this idiot would be gioven sensitivity training.
I whole grain agreed I should not have tossed the bagel.
ReplyDeleteI don't know if I would have behaved this way if my daughter had been with me as I admittedly wear a different hat with her. I would have most likely used this as a teachable moment as I am much more in control when she's with me when people are jerks because of the whole setting an example thing.
But hey, I got angry and I threw it. I usually have terrible aim. I was shocked it connected with him. And if I had been charged, I would have expected all of you to be at the courthouse. Carrying signs. Chanting. I can take my medicine, don't you worry!
I'd do one better and get you bail money lady! Hugs to you! For what it's worth I'm sorry this happened to you. Some people are douche canoes who deserve bagels or even worse thrown at them
DeleteI had relatives visiting from a really small town in Northern Manitoba and I took them on the subway to the Eaton Centre. Finally, after several stops, my aunt says LOUDLY "I can't get over how many black people there are in this city." This one young guy who heard her comes over and asks her where she's from. She proudly announces "Lynn Lake, Mannytuba (it's how she pronounces it)" and he smiles and says, "Ohhh so that's where all the white people went."
ReplyDeleteAs a black person, I can relate to many of these stories. Especially when white people, clearly from out of town and from somewhere really cold where black people are too smart to move to, ride the TTC and clutch their valuables to their chests when they see me and a group of my friends coming.
ReplyDeleteSaw this on reddit.... can you describe this person in better detail??? I work for a company in the RBC tower and this encounter sounds familiar to one I had. Guy I'm thinking of was stupid tall. Slender. Nice shoes. Tailored suit. Oozed money.
ReplyDeleteWhere on reddit??? He was tall for sure. Slender yes. He was very much put together.
ReplyDeleteSo many closet racists in Toronto. Trust me.
ReplyDeleteOn a bus in Montreal back in the early 70's a tourist couple from Maryland struck up a convo.
ReplyDeleteI was gobsmacked when one said that he "was amazed at the abundance of coloured people".
A good friend later told me I should have answered "Yes, and the OVER abundance of white people."
I was waiting for the Toronto train in Burlington one day when a 'sweet' old lady started talking to me. She said she was visiting from Australia and what did I think of Toronto? I said it was fine but a little dirtier and more dangerous than it used to be. She looked furtively left and right then turned to me and whispered: "The blacks?"
ReplyDeleteReddit link
ReplyDeletehttps://www.reddit.com/r/toronto/comments/40tym1/nastiness_on_the_go_train/?sort=confidence
So many reactions...
ReplyDeleteBest comment collection in forever.
Don't throw bagels. That said, I'd support bagel-throwing as an Olympic sport.
Why do people believe they have ANY right to comment on what other people eat, or look like, or wear? Have all the judgy, preachy or racist thoughts you want, but keep 'em in your own empty head.
You know, if you throw a bagel backhand, similar to a frisbee toss, you will achieve far better accuracy. Just sayin'.
ReplyDeleteI can't even imagine! People are horrible!!
ReplyDeleteAnon from 11:41 January 13, if that comment was made in the early 80s, perhaps he was quoting the song by the Monks? (the first album my then boyfriend, now husband, bought for me). Not that it would make it any less hurtful.
I think that it was completely acceptable to toss a bagel at him and I wouldn't worry about prosecution.
ReplyDeleteHaving said that, I do give the jerk full marks for being able to come up with a witty rejoinder to being hit with a bagel.
Agree, best comment collection in a while! Some made me smile, others made me sad.
Dude was on the ball for sure.
ReplyDeleteSomeone told me when I was ringing through their groceries as a teenager that I should make friends with Jenny Craig. I hear enjoyed the broken eggs and squished bread.
ReplyDeleteI hope... not I hear
Delete^ That's downright mean.
ReplyDeleteWas looking at my phone on a subway one day. A man standing at the doors walks over to me and says "no point in checking your phone, he's not going to message you back." I was a TTC employee at this point and couldn't really say anything in return.
ReplyDeleteOn the 5am Go train into Union, I was putting mascara on. One woman scoffed "shows how she was raised".